


Endings and Beginnings

by kinksock22



Series: New Life [3]
Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: 69 (Sex Position), Alpha Jensen, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha/Omega, Alternate Universe - Werewolf, Barebacking, Bottom Jared, Coming Untouched, Established Relationship, Future Fic, Knotting, Light Angst, M/M, Mating, Mating Bond, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Mpreg, Omega Jared, Oral Sex, RPS - Freeform, Rimming, Self-Lubrication, nonAU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-17
Updated: 2016-06-17
Packaged: 2018-07-15 16:28:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,904
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7230031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kinksock22/pseuds/kinksock22
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Supernatural ends and it's time for Jared and Jensen to move on with life. Problem is, Jared doesn't know what to do now and it takes a toll not only on him but his relationship with Jensen.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Endings and Beginnings

The end of _Supernatural_ is bittersweet.   
  
Jared can honestly say that it’s the thing he’s proudest of - and not just because it was the thing he did the longest - and they stuck with the plan to bow out gracefully when it was time, ending the show while it was still at its best instead of letting it linger and die a slow, painful death. In his mind, the last season was just as strong as most of the others that came before it. He knows that he’ll always be able to look back fondly on the little show that could and if he ever did anything else, it would always remain his crowning achievement.   
  
But even the best things come to an end and it was time to end it. He and Jensen and the producers, the rest of the cast and crew all came to the decision together and finally let the Winchester brothers rest their weary heads.   
  
Aside from being the best show he’d ever done and allowing him to meet some of the best people he’d ever known, the very best thing about _Supernatural_ will always be what the show gave him: his mate.  
  
He received awards and acclaim and friends and so much more from the show but the fact that it was where he met and fell in love with Jensen will always be what is most important about it in his mind.   
  
Walking away from the show isn’t as terrifying as it would’ve been just a few years ago. Jared gets to take the best part of it with him when he leaves.  
  
***  
  
After the final wrap party and a lot of tears and hugs and laughs, Jared and Jensen hole up in their little house in Vancouver for a week. They ignore the phone and the door - their families know only to get in touch in the case of an emergency - sleep in every morning and stay up late every night. Most days they don’t even get dressed. It definitely isn’t the first vacation they’ve had - not even the first vacation they’ve had since they mated - but there’s something different about _knowing_ that at the beginning of July they won’t be back on set, starting up a new season.   
  
They’d done a few cons over the summer, like always, and there will be a few more in the fall and winter then that’s it. One last convention season, the last one being in December and then they’ll be done with _Supernatural_ forever.  
  
It doesn’t really hit Jared until the first week of July, when they should be getting the first script of the new season.  
  
Jensen is off somewhere doing something - Jared hadn’t even paid attention when his mate told him - and Jared’s emotions are too scattered to focus on their bond to find him. He stands in the middle of the living room, staring at the far wall, his laptop open on the coffee table. There was no email from the writers or from Bob. There was a bunch of junk mail and something from his sister that he didn’t even read.   
  
Jared’s throat closes up and he feels the burn of tears stinging the corners of his eyes. His body starts to shake, his hands trembling. He has nothing to do. There’s nothing for him. He doesn’t know what the hell he’s supposed to do now.  
  
What is he supposed to do with himself?  
  
He and Jensen had talked after their week-long seclusion had ended. Jensen is going to scale back from the business. He’s not going to act anymore. He wants to direct. Jared thinks it’s a fantastic idea. Jensen is a brilliant director. He’s not going to do it full-time though. Maybe a project or two a year. They don’t really need the steady work.   
  
They also put the house up for sale and decided to move back to Texas. Austin, specifically. Neither wanted to move back to LA and while Vancouver had been home for a lot of years, they both wanted to head back to Texas.   
  
They already have a new place in Austin. The house in Vancouver has been sold. They’re moving out in a week.   
  
Jared finds himself in the middle of a full-blown panic attack.   
  
When they talked about moving and working and everything, Jared had decided that he wanted to walk away from the business completely. He doesn’t want to act anymore - even though he still loves it - and he never found the passion for the technical side of things that Jensen did.   
  
What the hell is he supposed to do now?  
  
Strong, familiar hands grip his arms and he catches a whiff of Jensen’s scent. He blinks, frowning in confusion when he finds himself sitting in the middle of the living room floor, green eyes full of concern staring at him.  
  
“Jensen?” Whoa. Is that his voice? It sounds like he’s been out drinking all night or gargling shards of broken glass. Or screaming himself hoarse.  
  
“Jared,” Jensen breathes and drops down onto his ass, pulling Jared into his arms, cradling Jared against his chest. “Oh God, baby. You... Fuck, Jay, you scared the fuck outta me. Are you okay?”  
  
“I don’t...” Jared mutters, frowning deeper. The last thing he remembers clearly was checking his email then it hitting him that the show is really over. “I don’t know,” Jared eventually whispers. “What happened?”  
  
“I don’t know,” Jensen echoes. “I was kinda hopin’ that you’d be able to tell me.”  
  
“Huh?”  
  
“I was goin’ through the shit in the garage and then I felt you,” Jensen pauses, shakes his head. “You were projecting pretty loudly, sweetheart. But it was just... All jumbled. I couldn’t get any clear emotions. Then you just started screaming. I came running, of course. You were just... You were just standing here, staring at the wall, screaming. I couldn’t get through to you. For like five minutes, you were just... Gone.” Jensen tightens his arms around Jared and turns his head, kisses his temple. “What happened, Jare?” he whispers.  
  
“I think it finally hit me,” Jared confesses, voice barely more than a breath of sound. “The show’s over. We’re moving. I’m unemployed. What the hell am I supposed to do now, Jensen?” Jared asks, tone rising, bordering on frantic. He can feel himself starting to freak out again.   
  
“Jay,” Jensen murmurs. Jared shakes his head and tries to pry himself out of Jensen’s hold. Jensen holds him tighter. “Jared,” Jensen snaps. “Stop it.”  
  
“What am I supposed to do?” Jared asks, blinking owlishly. “Sit around and be a damn housewife?”  
  
“Jared,” Jensen sighs, rubbing one hand up and down Jared’s back. “Go back to work if you want. Or don’t. Take some time to figure things out if that’s what you need. You can do whatever you want, sweetheart.”  
  
“All I’ve ever done is act, Jen,” Jared replies softly, slumping against his mate’s chest. “If I’m not an actor, then what am I?”  
  
“You’re you,” Jensen murmurs, kissing the top of Jared’s head. “You’re my brilliant, beautiful mate. And like I just said, you can do whatever you want. You don’t have to decide anything right now.”  
  
Jared wishes that it is as easy as Jensen makes it sound.  
  
***  
  
Jared spends the next week fighting off panic attack after panic attack. He can barely drag himself out of bed and on the occasions that he manages, he only makes it as far as the couch. His emotions and hormones are all completely out of control, alternately needing Jensen and unable to stand his scent. Which is made even more difficult by the fact that he’s inexplicably angry at his mate. Jensen begs him to talk, if not to him then at least to _someone_ , but Jared just glares and ignores him. The worst part of it all is that he _knows_ he’s being crazy but he can’t seem to make himself just _stop_.   
  
Finishing up the move falls completely to Jensen. Jared feels guilty but with whatever is wrong with him, he can’t do anything about it. And that just makes him feel worse all over again.  
  
Jensen is of course a trooper through it all. He’s perfect as always, weathering Jared’s changing moods – seriously, they change sometimes hourly – and cleans out the house, packs up their shit and arranges to have everything moved to Texas.   
  
He loves Jensen, God knows he loves him with a passion, but there are times that he really wishes his mate was a little less freaking perfect all the damn time. Especially right now. It all makes Jared feel worse.  
  
Everything makes Jared feel worse.   
  
All he can do is hope that once they move and get settled that things will go back to normal and he’ll feel like himself again.  
  
***  
  
Moving and settling in takes weeks. Jared’s able to fake it well enough to help but he still feels off, like he doesn’t belong in his own skin. He’s still avoiding Jensen as much as he can, which isn’t easy with neither of them working, and he’s still angry with him for no good or real reason.   
  
He can see the worry in Jensen’s eyes, can smell it in his scent. And if he hadn’t essentially shut down their bond, he knows he’d feel it too. He just doesn’t know how to reassure Jensen that he’s okay when he isn’t, doesn’t know how to tell Jensen that he’ll be okay when he isn’t sure that he will, when he doesn’t even know what’s wrong.   
  
He’s close enough now that his parents and siblings – along with Jensen’s – want to visit. Jared ignores their calls. Jensen manages to hold them off, promising they can come soon, tells them that they’re still settling in.   
  
Everyone listens but Megan.   
  
Jared’s baby sister is the most pig-headed, stubborn person he’s ever known – she gives the Winchesters a run for their money, seriously – and she completely ignores Jensen when he tells her soon and tells her that Jared can’t come to the phone because he’s out at the store but he’ll have him call her soon.   
  
He’s in their bedroom, still in bed at noon, when he hears the doorbell ring. He doesn’t need to scent her, doesn’t need the bond of family, to know that it’s Megan. But the light, fresh, airy scent that accompanies her usual scent is new.   
  
Jared frowns, head tilted to the side, as he listens to the murmur of her and Jensen talking downstairs. He opens up his bond with Jensen for the first time in weeks, trying to see if he can figure out through his mate what’s going on but Jensen’s surprise at feeling him again clouds everything else.  
  
Megan’s light footsteps and Jensen’s heavier ones move quickly toward the bedroom. Jared knows that this close, Megan can sense that _something_ inside him that’s gone wrong so he isn’t surprised when they both burst through the bedroom door. Both their wide-eyed stares are on him but Jared doesn’t even _see_ his mate and sister. All he can see is the baby in her arms.  
  
He’d almost, kind of, completely forgotten that she was pregnant and due around the time they were scheduled to move.   
  
The baby coos and turns toward Jared, chubby arms flailing aimlessly. Jared wracks his brain and tries to remember if Jensen told him about her giving birth – he’s sure that either Meg or his momma would’ve called and he knows Jensen would’ve told him – but he just honestly can’t remember.   
  
The baby – a little girl by the pink she’s swaddled in from head to toe – can’t be more than a few weeks old, maybe a month, just around the time Jared really started feeling bad and freaking out about everything. He knows one has nothing to do with the other but it doesn’t matter. Something shifts deep inside him and he pushes himself out of bed, stumbles toward his sister and niece.  
  
Jared stops short of touching either of them but he can’t tear his gaze away. He flinches when he feels Jensen’s hand brush against his cheek, only realizes then that he’s crying.  
  
“JT,” Megan whispers, taking a step closer. Jared finally looks away from his niece and into his sister’s face, surprised to see tears in her eyes as well. “What’s wrong?”  
  
“How old is she?” Jared rasps, voice rough from emotion and disuse.  
  
“Three weeks,” Meg answers softly. “Momma and I both called and talked to Jensen… You never called us back.”  
  
“I’m sorry,” Jared whispers. “I, uh, there’s been… I haven’t been feelin’ okay lately.” Megan raises an eyebrow and snorts softly. “Okay, so it’s been more than that. I didn’t know what was wrong with me. I-I still don’t know why I was feelin’ the way I have been.” Megan tilts her head, her eyes softening. “I don’t know,” Jared breathes, running one hand through his messy hair. “After we wrapped, I felt… lost, unsure. I’ve been depressed and angry and I don’t know why.” He flashes her a tight, sad smile. “Except now I think I do.”  
  
Megan smiles back and holds out the baby, nodding when Jared hesitates. “Her name is Lily,” Megan tells him softly as he takes his niece, carefully cradling her small body against his chest.   
  
Jared hasn’t lied to Jensen when they mated about being hard-wired to want children. It comes naturally to him as an omega. With the show and everything, he’s had to put it off for so long, it kind of became something that he thought would just never happen. And he hadn’t realized just how much that hurt, how much he really, truly does want to have a family.   
  
He dips down and nuzzles against the top of Lily’s head, closes his eyes. She has a headful of dark, silky-soft hair and it tickles his nose, surprising a watery chuckle from his throat.   
  
With everything going on, the mess inside his head, he forgot to close off the bond with Jensen again. For the first time in weeks he _feels_ his mate in his head, his heart, feels how much Jensen loves him, feels exactly what seeing Jared cuddling with a baby does to Jensen.  
  
Jared reopens his eyes and smiles at his sister, carefully handing Lily back to her. “She’s beautifully, Meggie,” he says softly. “And I wanna spend time with both of you, I do.” He glances at Jensen, heart breaking a little at the look in his mate’s green eyes. “But there’s somethin’ I gotta fix, okay?” His voice has gone raspy again and he clears his throat, leaning forward to kiss his sister’s cheek and his niece’s head. “Tomorrow, okay?” he asks. “I promise.”  
  
“Of course, Jay,” Megan replies softly. She can no doubt sense the tension between him and Jensen just like she could sense what was wrong with Jared. “Tomorrow.” She carefully bounces up on her tippy-toes and kisses first Jared then Jensen on the cheek. “I’ll just let myself out,” she murmurs after shooting them one last smile.  
  
Jared watches her go then turns to his mate. There’s _so_ much coming through their bond from Jensen that it overwhelms Jared for a moment, making him have to physically take a step backward even though it doesn’t help.  
  
“Jen,” he whispers, rubbing at his chest, his heart. “Gotta dial it down, love. I, uh, I can’t think. Or breathe.”  
  
Jensen inhales deeply and Jared can see him forcefully pushing down the barrage of emotions – hurt, concern, anger, jealousy, desire, and love, so much love. Jared nods, smiling gratefully. Jensen clenches his jaw and closes his eyes. “Jared,” he breathes.  
  
Unable to resist, Jared closes the distance between them and pulls Jensen into his arms. Jensen doesn’t hesitate, just wraps his arms around Jared in return, pulling him impossibly closer. Jared melts into his mate’s arms, turns his head and buries his face in the curve of Jensen’s shoulder, nosing at his steady, familiar heartbeat. Jensen’s scent is strong there and Jared can’t bite back a whimper, pushing forward, trying in vain to get impossibly closer.  
  
Jensen slides one hand into his hair, palms the back of his head, his other hand strong and steady between Jared’s shoulder blades. “I’ve missed you,” Jared mumbles.  
  
“Been right here, Jay,” Jensen replies quietly, matter-of-factly, not unkindly, but it still stings. It’s true. Jared _has_ missed Jensen but it’s been by his own design.  
  
“I’m so sorry, Jensen,” Jared breathes. He can feel himself trembling, his emotions barely contained beneath the surface. Fresh tears sting his eyes and he swallows thickly.   
  
“Shh,” Jensen coos, rubbing up and down his spine. “I know, baby. It’s okay, I know.”  
  
“It’s not okay,” Jared argues. He pulls himself from Jensen’s arms, even though it feels roughly like cutting off a limb. “I’ve been horrible,” he continues, pacing away from Jensen, both hands tugging at his hair. “For no reason…”  
  
“Jay,” Jensen sighs, reaching for him.   
  
Jared shies away from Jensen’s hand and keeps pacing. “No, please,” he mutters. “Just… Lemme say this. I _need_ to say this.” Jensen sighs again but nods, standing still and watching Jared pace. “Instead of talking to you, like I should’ve, I pulled away. I let my fears and insecurities get the best of me and I put major, undue stress on you and our bond.” He huffs out a breath and finally stops pacing, stopping in front of his mate. “I’ve been so… lost,” he continues, echoing what he told Megan. “And angry.” Jensen opens his lips but Jared shakes his head, eyes pleading. “Don’t tell me that it’s okay,” he rasps. “I was angry with _you_ and you did nothing to deserve it.”  
  
“Okay,” Jensen nods, brow furrowed. “I don’t… If I can’t tell you it’s okay, I don’t really know what to say right now,” he confesses.   
  
“Jensen,” Jared sighs, shoulders slumping.  
  
“I’m sorry,” Jensen shrugs one shoulder, taking a step closer, one hand reaching up to palm his cheek. “It _is_ okay, sweetheart,” he murmurs. “I knew that you were struggling and it’s okay that you were. I’d never tell you that _anything_ you feel is wrong. What hurt was you shutting me out. The depression and the anger, all the rest of it, _that_ I could take, I could’ve dealt with. Having you pull away from me, feeling like I was losing you? _That’s_ what I couldn’t handle.”  
  
“I lost myself, Jen,” Jared admits softly, weakly. “But you were never in danger of losing me.”  
  
“Didn’t really feel that way at the time, Jay.” He leans up and brushes a soft, chaste kiss to Jared’s lips. “You ready to talk to me now?” he asks softly.  
  
Jared nods, leaning into Jensen’s touch for a second before pulling away again. “You heard everything I said to Megan,” Jared starts quietly, his eyes fluttering closed for a few moments. “I wasn’t… I meant all that. I didn’t know what was wrong, just that _something_ was. Ending the show… I don’t know, it just hit me harder than I thought it would. Then moving and not having anything to do, knowing that you plan to continue to work at least a little… It just felt like everything was changing around me and I was standing still. I felt like I was being left behind. I knew that I didn’t want to work anymore but I didn’t know what I wanted to do instead.”  
  
“Who says you have to do anything?” Jensen asks, frowning slightly.  
  
“’cause just sittin’ around, that ain’t me, Jen. You know that.”   
  
“True,” Jensen agrees with a small, fond smile.  
  
“What it all comes down to is,” Jared continues, huffing out another sigh. “I put things off in favor of the show, for so long. First, being myself and finding my mate. Then having a family. It felt like for a while there that I was never going to get to have that. And now the show is over and I realized that I don’t have to wait anymore.” Jared smiles tentatively, his heart pounding, his entire body trembling. “When I saw Lily,” he continues with a whisper. “It hit me and everything became clear. Something inside me settled, shifted into place that I didn’t even realize was out of place. And that’s the best thing I can blame my meltdown or whatever that was on. I… I want a family. I wanna have a baby. _That’s_ what I wanna do with the rest of my life.” Jensen stares at him for a few long minutes in silence and even though Jensen hasn’t really gotten the hang of blocking his emotions from Jared, or just never really tries, right now Jared can’t read him. “Jensen,” he breathes. “Please say something?”  
  
Jensen reaches out and grabs him, pulling him back into his arms. He crushes Jared to his chest, once again palming the back of Jared’s head. “I know you felt what it did to me seein’ you with her,” Jensen rasps against his ear, warm, wet lips brushing against his skin and making Jared shiver. “How can it even be a doubt, Jared?”  
  
“I’m still a little… off,” Jared mutters in his own defense. “And my hormones are all over the place right now.”  
  
Jensen pulls away just enough to cup both sides of his face, their eyes locking together. “Okay,” Jensen replies quietly. “Lemme make it completely, undeniably clear. I’d love to have a family with you. It’s all I’ve been thinking about, in the back of my mind, since the day we mated. Sure, at the time, I wasn’t ready. But it has always been something that I want, something that I knew we’d do when the time was right.”  
  
“Okay,” Jared replies, taking a shaky breath. “Okay. So… We’re gonna do this? We’re gonna have a baby?”  
  
“The second your heat hits, sweetheart,” Jensen murmurs.  
  
Jared blinks, unexpected heat surging through his whole system. Jensen’s eyes darken and he smirks, dragging Jared backward toward their bed.   
  
They’re late meeting Megan the next day.  
  
***  
  
Once they decided to have a baby, Jared stopped the birth control right away. They don’t tell anyone that they’re going to try because Jared doesn’t want to jinx it. Jensen thinks it’s adorable. Jared’s dead serious. He honestly doesn’t even know if he’ll be able to get pregnant. Just because he’s an omega doesn’t guarantee anything. There are plenty of infertile omegas out there, same as humans.  
  
The next three months spent waiting for Jared’s heat seemed to simultaneously drag and fly. Jared found himself changing his mind several times over, not because he didn’t want to have a baby, but because he questioned everything else. Were they ready? Would he even be a good father? Did Jensen really want this or was it just because Jared did? There was also a part of him that was afraid to even try because of the risk of failure. Not having kids because they didn’t want them or weren’t ready was one thing, but not having them because Jared _couldn’t_ was unthinkable.   
  
God, the thought of being that much of a failure was enough to drive Jared crazy. He’s an omega for fuck sake, his body is _literally_ designed to have children.  
  
Jensen curls around him from behind, lips pressed to his bare shoulder. “Stop it,” his mate mutters, tone full of sleep. Jared winces and glances at the clock. It’s three in the freaking morning.   
  
“Sorry,” Jared sighs. “I… I can’t sleep. I’ll go downstairs or something so I don’t bother you.”  
  
“Sweetheart, you could go to the moon and I’d still be able to feel you freakin’ out,” Jensen replies quietly. He turns Jared onto his back, leaning up on one elbow to look down at him. “I don’t want you to go downstairs,” Jensen continues seriously. “I don’t care if you can’t sleep. Or well, I care, but not because you’re botherin’ me or anything.” He pulls Jared more against his chest, his arm wrapping tight around Jared’s waist. He dips down and nuzzles Jared’s cheek, lips brushing against the corner of Jared’s mouth. “I just want you to stop freakin’ out,” Jensen whispers against his lips. “And if you can’t, I want you to talk to me instead’a lying here, driving yourself crazy.”  
  
“You mean, again?” Jared huffs.  
  
“No,” Jensen answers slowly, carefully. “That’s not what I mean at all. You weren’t crazy, baby. You were upset and panicked and depressed. And I don’t want you to have to go through it again.”  
  
“What if we try and it doesn’t work?” Jared whispers, voicing out-loud his deepest fear. “I don’t wanna disappoint you.”  
  
“First, you could _never_ disappoint me,” Jensen insists, soft but firm. “Second, if it doesn’t work, we’ll try again.”  
  
“What if it never works?”   
  
“It will.”  
  
“You don’t know that, Jensen,” Jared frowns. “There could be somethin’ wrong with me…”  
  
“You’re perfect,” Jensen counters, predictably. “You can’t defeat yourself before you even try, Jay.”  
  
“I’m scared, Jen,” Jared confesses. “I want this, so much. And I’m afraid that I want it _too_ much. That somehow that will work against me.”  
  
“I’m not going to dismiss you or your fears,” Jensen murmurs. “You know I’d never do that to you. But I can tell you, that either way, everything’s gonna be okay.”  
  
“I love you,” Jared sighs.  
  
“Love you, too,” Jensen replies with a smile and a chaste kiss. “Now, get some rest.”  
  
Jared doesn’t remember falling asleep but he wakes up the next morning, thin sheet stuck to his sticky, overheated skin. He moans softly and rolls over onto his stomach, grinding his hips down, dragging his already hard, leaking cock against the mattress. It only takes seconds – that feels like an eternity – for him to feel Jensen’s familiar weight settle over his back, pressing him down into the bed, his mate’s lips and teeth moving over his shoulder, the back of his neck.  
  
Jared wiggles and squirms, spreads his legs as wide as possible, and rubs back against Jensen, sobbing out another moan. “Jen,” he rasps. “God, please…”  
  
“I’m here, baby,” Jensen half-growls, already reaching between them and lining up his cock. They both groan when Jensen sinks into his wet, loosened hole, automatically falling into a rhythm.   
  
Jared flails one arm back and grabs Jensen’s hip, short fingernails digging into his skin, pushing back into every thrust. Jensen feels amazing, as always, but as it usually is with his heats, it just isn’t enough. “More,” he chokes out. “Need more.”  
  
Jensen grabs both his hips and pulls him up, helping him shift up onto his knees. Jared settles his weight on his elbows, head hanging between his shoulders, back bowed as he presses his ass higher in the air. Jensen, bless him, takes the unspoken hint and shifts his own weight, mounts him higher, and picks up the pace and strength, thick cock angled to hit his sweet spot on every stroke.   
  
Usually, Jared enjoys taking his time and working up to the needy, frantic level they always seem to end up at but with his heat riding him hard, he just doesn’t have the patience for it. He pushes back hard against Jensen, skin slapping together wetly, wanting Jensen as deep as possible, wanting to feel that perfect, thick knot pressing against him, tying him to his mate, _breeding_ him.  
  
The thought that they could be making a baby just somehow makes it even hotter for Jared, makes him more desperate and needy. He groans and pushes up onto his hands, his arms shaky and growls, fucking back against Jensen even harder.  
  
Jensen’s hands tighten on his hips and he drapes himself over Jared’s back, biting at his shoulder. “Fuck, Jay,” he gasps. “So good. Not gonna last, sweetheart.”  
  
“Don’t care,” Jared replies breathlessly. “Need it, Jen. C’mon.”  
  
Jensen moans and kisses his way up Jared’s neck, biting at the hinge of his jaw. “Want m’knot that bad, baby?” he murmurs.  
  
“Yes,” Jared hisses. “Want it. Need it.”  
  
Jensen pushes in deep and Jared groans, pushing back against him, circling his hips as Jensen grinds forward. Jensen wasn’t kidding. It doesn’t take long for Jensen’s knot to pop, swelling completely and tying them together. Jensen reaches beneath him and grabs his cock, twisting his wrist as he thumbs at the leaking head.   
  
“C’mon, Jay,” Jensen coaxes.  
  
Jared vaguely feels Jensen’s knot pulse and the first wave of his release, liquid-warmth filling him so perfectly, before he tips over the edge, crying out hoarsely as he comes, collapsing onto his chest as he trembles through his orgasm, Jensen’s thick, clever fingers milking every drop from him until he just can’t take it anymore.   
  
Jensen moves them to their sides and curls around his back, kissing his shoulder and neck, the side of his face, wherever he can reach. Jared’s eyes are closed and he smiles tiredly, weakly turning his head so their lips slide together.  
  
“Mm,” he hums. “Good mornin’.”  
  
Jensen chuckles and tightens his arms around Jared, nuzzling their faces together. “Hell yeah it is,” he snorts.

 

Jared rolls his eyes fondly and snuggles back more into Jensen’s embrace.  
  
The next time Jared wakes up, Jensen is spread out on his back and Jared’s sprawled across his chest, as much of Jared’s warm skin touching Jensen’s as possible. He can feel his heat starting to spike again, still just a gentle wave, so Jared merely turns his head, mouthing lazily at the firm pec beneath his cheek, every now and then swirling his tongue around Jensen’s nipple. Jensen grunts and slides a hand into Jared’s hair but doesn’t wake up and Jared smirks to himself, pausing in his ministrations until Jensen settles down again.  
  
Jared moves carefully and slips down the bed further, teasing his lips and tongue lightly down Jensen’s chest and stomach. Jensen makes another noise and turns his head slightly, his fingers tightening reflexively, but he’s still mostly asleep. Every move or noise, Jared stops until Jensen settles again then he continues on.    
  
He can see Jensen’s cock twitching, almost half-hard, and an intense wave of lust knocks into him. He closes his eyes for a second and rides it out, forcing himself to ignore the slight itch that’s starting beneath his skin, the empty ache he’s starting to really feel deep inside him.  
  
He slowly untangles himself from Jensen and crawls between his legs and licks his lips, quickly but carefully slipping them over the tip of Jensen’s cock. He knows damn-well Jensen won’t remain asleep for long – seconds at best – and Jared wants to take advantage of every bit of time he has.  
  
Sure enough, Jared gets barely a few seconds of Jensen’s still half-hard length resting on his tongue, just barely registers the mixed taste of _them_ on his flesh, when Jensen’s hands end up buried in his hair, Jensen sitting straight up in the bed.   
  
“Jesus _fuck_ ,” Jensen growls. “God, baby.” Jensen’s hands tighten in Jared’s hair as Jared pulls back, swirling his tongue around the tip, then drags his tongue back down the shaft, teasing at the thick vein. Jensen groans and flops back down against the mattress, spreading his legs wider to give Jared more room. Jared drops down and mouths wetly at the swell of Jensen’s balls, sucking first one then the other into his mouth, tonguing at the seam then slides his lips back up and over the tip of his cock, taking Jensen as deep as possible. “Jared,” Jensen moans, hips trembling with the exertion of not thrusting up. “C’mere, sweetheart,” he murmurs, tugging gently on Jared’s hair.  
  
Jared reluctantly pulls away and crawls up Jensen’s body, moaning softly as he drops his hips, their hard lengths rubbing together. He pouts down at his mate as he settles against him, arms on either side of Jensen’s head. “Wasn’t done,” he frowns slightly.  
  
Jensen uses the hold he still has on Jared’s hair and pulls him down into a wet, messy kiss. Jared’s gasping when Jensen pulls back, a smirk pulling up one side of his kiss-bruised lips, a twinkle in his lust-blown emerald eyes. “Wanna keep suckin’ m’cock, baby?” he drawls, sliding one hand down Jared’s spine, pressing against the small of his back, urging Jared’s hips to rock down. Jared moans at the sweet burst of friction, another wave of his heat creeping through his veins, leaving him trembling. He nods and dips down, mouthing at the corner of Jensen’s lips. “Turn around, Jay,” Jensen whispers against Jared’s lips. “Wanna taste you too.”  
  
Jared groans and scrambles to turn around, carefully throwing his leg over Jensen’s shoulder, straddling his head. Jensen grabs his hips and helps guide him back as Jared leans forward, elbows resting on the mattress on either side of Jensen’s hips. He grabs Jensen’s cock with one hand, fingers teasing around the loose flesh at the base where Jensen’s knot will expand, just to listen to the tortured moan from his mate’s lips, smirking to himself. Usually it’s Jensen that teases him relentlessly, leaving him a moaning, trembling mess. It’s nice knowing that he has the same power over his mate.  
  
Jensen gets him back right away though. Instead of slipping his lips over Jared’s cock like he’s expecting, Jensen tilts his hips down just a bit more and licks directly over his leaking, aching hole. Jared moans harshly and drops his head, his forehead resting against Jensen’s hip. Jensen gently scrapes his teeth over Jared’s entrance before slipping his tongue inside, flicking at the rim. Jensen is such a dirty cheater, he knows that Jared is basically freaking useless when his tongue is anywhere on his body, especially _there_.   
  
Inhaling deeply, Jared lifts his head and slides his lips over the tip of Jensen’s cock, moaning at the taste of pre-come exploding on his tongue. He tightens his fingers around the base, stimulating Jensen’s knot, and bobs his head, hollowing his cheeks as he pulls back, tongue dipping into the slit to chase the pleasant, addictive taste of his mate.   
  
Jensen reaches beneath him and grabs his cock, thumb sliding over the head, smearing Jared’s pre-come down his shaft as he starts to jerk him off, his tongue pressing deeper into his hole. He slides two fingers of his other hand in next to his tongue, tips immediately pressing against his prostate, milking the swollen gland.  
  
Jared pulls away from Jensen’s cock with a gasp, his hips thrusting down against Jensen without direct consent from his brain. “Oh God, Jen,” he moans, rolling his sweat-damp forehead against Jensen’s hip, eyes squeezed closed. “Feels so good, love.” Jensen twists his wrist, fingers pressing in deeper and Jared cries out. “Oh God,” he repeats. “More, babe. I need more. Need you in me…” The teasing and foreplay is amazing but his heat has spiked fully, leaving him feeling empty and achy, needing nothing but his mate’s knot.  
  
Jensen pulls away and squirms out from beneath Jared, leaving him kneeling in the middle of the bed, facing the end, and settles behind Jared, one hand on his hip, the other lining himself up. He pushes in without waiting, not stopping until he’s buried to the hilt. Jared moans, his shaking arms giving out, his chest collapsing against the mattress. He arches his back and tilts his hips up higher, pushing back against each of Jensen’s thrusts.  
  
Jensen settles over his back, wraps one arm around Jared’s chest, kissing wetly at his shoulder, up his neck. “Always feel so good, sweetheart,” Jensen murmurs against his ear, teeth scraping the lobe.   
  
Jared moans in agreement and reaches back with one arm, gripping the back of his neck. “Jen, more, please,” he begs. “Harder, deeper. Please…” Jensen gives him everything he needs, thrusting hard and deep, angled to hit his sweet spot perfectly. “God, babe, so good. Already so close.”  
  
Jensen slides his hand down Jared’s chest and curls his fingers around his cock, jerking him in sync to each perfect thrust. “Me too, baby,” Jensen rasps, lips dragging down his neck again, teasing over the faded scar of his mating bite. Jared cries out and squeezes his eyes closed, his cock twitching eagerly in Jensen’s fist. Jensen’s thrusts slow down, his half-swollen knot catching on Jared’s rim, burning pleasantly. “C’mon and come for me, Jay.”  
  
It takes a matter of seconds for Jared to tip over the edge, crying out again weakly, trembling as Jensen pushes in deep, grinding against his prostate, drawing his orgasm out almost to the point of pain. He’s just barely aware of Jensen’s knot swelling the rest of the way, tying them together. Jensen moans against his ear and Jared feels the liquid warmth of Jensen’s release filling him up. Just like a few hours ago, the thought that they could be making a baby, that Jensen is breeding him, makes him shiver, his cock twitching weakly as his body is wracked with aftershocks.  
  
Jensen tips them to the side and curls around Jared’s back. Jared smiles and turns his head, pressing an off-center kiss to Jensen’s lips. He can feel Jensen smile into the kiss, his arms tightening around Jared. “I love you,” Jared whispers when he pulls away, looking up into his mate’s eyes.  
  
“Love you, too, baby,” Jensen whispers back, absently rubbing his hand up and down Jared’s chest and stomach.  
  
***  
  
Jared wakes up slowly, blinking his eyes open as he stretches his pleasantly sore body, smiling at the ache of well-used muscles. He and Jensen had ended up tied together three more times during the rest of the previous day and night, leaving Jared well-fucked and content. He sighs happily and rolls over, cuddling against Jensen’s side. His mate is asleep and Jared doesn’t wake him up, he definitely deserves the rest while he can get it.  
  
He closes his eyes again and takes stock of his body, trying to get some sense of when the next wave of his heat will hit. Aside from the slight soreness of his muscles and the unpleasant stickiness of their various fluids, he feels well-rested and more like himself than he has in a while.  
  
Frowning slightly he pulls away and sits up, head tilted to the side. His heat should last another five to six days. The only reason that he wouldn’t be feeling it is if…  
  
“Holy fuck,” Jared blurts out, one hand pressing to his stomach.  
  
Jensen sits up at his outburst and turns to him, blinking sleepily but eyes dark with concern. “What’s wrong, baby?”   
  
Jared looks at Jensen, opening and closing his lips a few times before clamping them closed, not sure what to say. Jensen frowns and reaches out, sliding his hand up Jared’s arm to cup his neck, thumb brushing over his jaw. “Jared, what? You’re kinda freakin’ me out here.”  
  
“My heat,” Jared breathes, blinking owlishly.  
  
Understanding floods Jensen’s face and he scoots closer, sliding his fingers into Jared’s hair, pulling him closer. “Spiking again?” he asks softly.  
  
“No,” Jared whispers, shaking his head. “Jensen… I feel fine.”  
  
“That’s good, sweetheart,” Jensen smiles, leaning forward to brush a kiss to his lips. “You need a chance to rest, it’s good that it hasn’t spiked again yet.”  
  
“No, Jen,” Jared mutters, pulling away from Jensen and stumbling from the bed. He can’t explain it but he’s kind of freaking out. At first, he was freaked that it wouldn’t work but now that it has? Now he’s freaked about the rest of the things he’d been obsessed over. Are they really ready for this? Is _he_? Will he be a good father?   
  
Jensen follows him immediately, grabbing Jared’s shoulders to keep him from pacing. Or from taking off running, either is a possibility at the moment. “Jared,” Jensen murmurs, pulling him against his chest, one hand palming the back of his head. “Baby, I didn’t realize at first.” He presses a kiss to Jared’s temple. Jared frowns, confused for a second until he realizes that he must be projecting his emotions loud and clear across their bond. “It’s okay,” he continues. “Just calm down and breathe. Everything’s okay.”  


Jared pulls away from Jensen just far enough to look into his eyes, reassured slightly by the warm love flowing through their bond and the calmness in those emerald-green eyes. “Sorry,” he whispers. “I just… I know I was worried that it wouldn’t work but now… God, Jensen,” his eyes widen and he shakes his head. “I’m freakin’ pregnant. Are we ready for this? D’you really want it? What if I’m a terrible father?”  
  
Jensen chuckles softly and pulls Jared back in, their chests pressed together. “You know I want it,” Jensen replies softly. “We both do. And we’re ready. Or as ready as anyone can ever be.” He presses a kiss to Jared’s cheek, lips lingering as he adds, “And you’re gonna be an _amazing_ father. You can do anything, Jared. And I’mma be here with you, every step’a the way.”  
  
Jared sighs and melts against Jensen’s chest. “You’re the one that’s amazing,” Jared mutters, slumping down a bit awkwardly so he can bury his face in Jensen’s neck. He inhales deeply, taking in his mate’s familiar scent, letting it calm the rest of his frayed nerves. With Jensen by his side, there’s nothing he can’t do.   



End file.
